Before I share this weeks longer note I want to say thank you for all the lovely messages of support, you are truly amazing people. I also want to congratulate those who reached out and asked who I had counselling with, thats a brave first step my friends.
This week I talk about rejection.
After my seventh job application was rejected, I've been ruminating on what could have gone wrong. Feedback has been fairly typical “there was a strong field” , “we had a lot of applications” and “we were looking for more of…” however you look at it, I’ve been left with my own could offs and should offs, until now….
Over the last 48 hours I have been doubling down on the following to help get me going again:
1. Go Work Out – Exercise helps me feel better physically and mentally. When I'm working out, I'm not thinking about the job rejections anymore, it’s impossible with a heavy object ready to fall on you at any moment. The endorphins, released in the brain help reduce pain and increase my feelings of pleasure, reduce stress and anxiety. Exercise and the endorphins improve my mood, cognitive function, and overall promotes better mental health. My wife once had a t-shirt saying I hit the gym so I don’t hit people - this is sound advice!
2. Go ask questions – I can't read the interviewer's mind, so I might as well ask them for feedback. It's the best way to get specific and tangible things I can work on. Approaching these difficult conversations allows me to confront any fear or anxieties building up, and helps me to manage my emotions. This is part of an ongoing practice to have more difficult conversations, and by doing so developing my emotional intelligence and helps me navigate future conflicts more effectively.
3. Go check the basics – Am I getting enough sleep, eating well, connecting to loved ones and taking breaks to unwind. Sleep plays a crucial role in physical and mental restoration, while proper nutrition and human connection help to reduce stress and promote feelings of happiness and fulfilment. This is a working progress, my nutrition is great, my sleep was getting better but in my efforts to connect to Adrienne we have found watching the Korean show “physical 100” is starting to creep into the bedtime routine!
4. Go make something better – I'm starting a new course to become a certified health coach. It's something that will help me grow and make me feel like I'm making a positive change in my life. Learning something new and challenging can increase feelings of self-efficacy and competence, leading to a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction. It also promotes neural plasticity, which helps the brain to reorganise and create new connections, leading to improved cognitive function and overall well-being.
5. Go and accept the situation – Sometimes, things don't work out the way we want them to. Instead of beating myself up, I'm remembering to accept what I can't control and focus on what I can. Radical acceptance involves me accepting and embracing reality rather than fighting against it. When I accept things as they are, I can reduce stress, anxiety, and negative emotions, and improve my overall sense of well-being. I can not give myself a job, but I can accept the decision and go do something to make sure it does not keep happening.
I write once again to say it's okay to not feel okay and to take time to process emotions. But don't stop taking action towards where you want to be.
I will keep pushing forward, I got this!
Looking for a health coach to help you achieve your goals?
Consider seeking a coach like myself who takes a person-centred approach - connect via response to this email or via the contact us form at Habitual.club
Person-centred coaching is all about putting you in the driver's seat and supporting you to identify your goals and develop a plan that works for you, rather than pushing you in a certain direction.
With a person-centred coach, you'll be able to explore your own values and motivations, which can be a powerful tool for making lasting change. Rather than simply telling you what to do, your coach will help you discover your own solutions and strategies for overcoming obstacles.
Person-centred coaching is also highly individualised. Your coach will take the time to understand your unique needs and circumstances, and develop a plan that works specifically for you. This approach can help you achieve greater success in making lifestyle changes, and may even help you reach goals you never thought were possible.
So if you're looking for a supportive and personalised approach to health coaching, consider seeking out a person-centred coach like myself.
Together, we can work to help you achieve your goals and create lasting change.
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